Do you find, as you settle in at home with your newborn, that the only place they will sleep for naps or at night is in your arms? Trust me, I have been there too, and the ninja moves of using the bathroom while holding a newborn baby who sleeps are real. Rest assured, though, we can help support you through this postpartum period and assist you in putting your newborn down safely in the crib or bassinet to sleep.
Why Do Newborns Prefer to be Held to Sleep?
First, newborns spend 9 months in the womb, in a very tight space. This closeness triggers their parasympathetic nervous system, helping them relax and sleep more deeply.
The gentle rocking, swaying, and warmth of your arms mimics what they experienced inside you: a constant motion, muffled sounds, and cozy security, which is why so many newborns prefer to be swaddled to sleep.
I always recommend that new parents review their ultrasound to see the baby’s arm position, which can help them choose the best baby swaddle based on the infant’s preferred arm position. If they spent 9 months with their arms above their head, that is likely the swaddle they will want.
Wake Windows for Newborns are Short
The newborn wake window is 45-60 minutes. Newborns’ brains and bodies are growing at an astonishing rate. They’re forming millions of neural connections and laying the foundation for developmental milestones.
During sleep, the growth hormone (GH) is released, which is vital for physical growth and brain development, plus they don’t have a well-developed circadian rhythm (their internal “sleep clock”) that starts to mature around 2-4 months. Before that, they rely on short sleep cycles to meet their biological needs.
If a newborn is awake too long, they become overtired, their bodies release cortisol (a stress hormone) to stay awake, which makes it harder to fall and stay asleep. Short wake windows prevent this cycle, which can help their nursing and bottle feeding habits positively, as overtired babies can struggle to eat well.
How Do I Help a Newborn Sleep in the Crib or Bassinet?
My expert advice as a Certified Sleep Consultant supporting thousands of newborns over the past decade is to start with one nap a day, usually the first of the day working on the transition to the crib or bassinet.
Why? There are less variables at that time. The baby has woken and typically taken a full feed. The other variables like gas, overtired, and stimulation are more minimal at that point in the day, vs. later in the day, when I find that things can compound.
Start with a clean diaper, then swaddle, with a few minutes of rocking, song, prayers, or calming around the room with baby on your shoulder. Between 45 & 60 minutes, baby will be ready for a nap, place them in the crib or bassinet. Remember Safe Sleep Recommendations: Hard surface, placed down on their back, with nothing in the sleep space but baby & maybe a pacifier.
Watching for the signs they are tired, before you see things like yawning, which can mean you missed the window are crucial to avoid overtired and get them to settle. Offer some gentle comfort while they lay, allowing them to get familiar with the space and the safety and security of it. It’s absolutely ok to offer a hand on their chest, a finger for them to grab, some light singing or shushing, etc. to settle independently to sleep. The first time they fall asleep, great! You did it. Now, slowly over the course of 1 week, allow the skill of sleep to build and have them then try that for the 3 and even 5th naps of the day, supporting the 2nd and 4th naps by walking them in the stroller or holding them to sleep for those naps, to prevent overtired.
When Will a Newborn Take Longer Naps?
Newborns start taking longer naps around 4 months as their sleep cycles mature from short, 30–45 minute stretches to longer, 1–2 hour naps. In the first few weeks (0–2 months), naps are naturally short and irregular because of immature sleep cycles and the lack of a fully developed circadian rhythm.
By 3–4 months, babies develop more adult-like sleep patterns with sleep cycles that are about 60–90 minutes long, and they begin to self-soothe and connect these cycles for longer naps. Consistent routines and following age-appropriate wake windows can support this transition, helping babies develop more consolidated daytime sleep by 5 months, when they are transitioning naps from 4 – 3 and then to 2 naps between 6 months and 7 months.
Is Sleep Training a Newborn OK?
I don’t like that term. Newborns need us to help them grow and thrive, so in the traditional sense of what it means to sleep train, then no. However, you can absolutely help a newborn get their nutritional and sleep needs, while safely building the skill of settling to sleep {AKA Sleep Training a Newborn} without the need to formally do it, cry-it-out, or need to hire a Certified Sleep Consultant.
Sleep is a skill, so as long as you are feeding baby every 3 hours, to maximize intake in the day for the 24-32 oz of milk they need in a 24 hour period, they will start to sleep through the night as their body is ready. It’s normal and expected newborns wake at night to feed, so after they eat and burp overnight, laying them back down awake will help compound the skills of sleep without the need to sleep train your newborn. They will naturally start to sleep longer overnight, pushing out when they wake to eat as their belly grows and can sustain more milk for longer. We dive deep into this in my free 40 page Newborn Essentials for Sleep Digital book, which you can download here.
Remember, sleep is progress not perfection and newborns can be developing differently through the 4th trimester. Seek help and support from an experienced professional, like a Certified Sleep Coach on our team. The Slumber Squad brings Certified Lactation Counseling {CLC} experience, postpartum doula experience and a diverse educational background to ensure we are supporting your needs and goals as a family unit.
